Sunday, July 11, 2021

Indigo Child

 




 The Indigo Child

The 9th Illustration in The Michael Jackson Series
Illustration by Donna Massa  2011

Let me begin by first defining what “The Indigo Child” means.  The earliest reports of the first New Age children are called Indigo’s.  These children first appeared just after World War II.  Between 1950 and 1960.  There was a strong surge of them being born.  The last of the Indigo’s were born in the late 60’s and 70’s.  They are part of the newer Indigo vibration.  The colors of the Indigo vibration are royal blue, midnight blue, and purple blue.  The most important physical attributes if these children are their eyes, the shape, size, and color, their deep expression of sympathy and wisdom.  These children are sensitive, intuitive, and compassionate, with a clear sense of self-definition and a strong feeling that they need to make a significant difference in the world.  They came into the world for one reason: to initiate the start of significant change.  Many of them choose to become vegetarians.  They are diet conscious, and they believe in all that is natural and have deep respect for nature and all its inhabitants.  They place a high regard for health and keeping the body fit and a strong tendency to fight the aging process.  Their involvement with humanity displayed itself as a burning desire to become deeply involved and passionate about their beliefs through rallying and demonstrations, reaching out to help bring awareness and inspire others to evoke change.  They embody a deep sense of equality, privacy, and integrity.  They stick to strong matters of principle, so don’t be mistaken: Indigo’s will stand firmly by their convictions if compromised.  Many of them are activists, advocates for what they believe in and not afraid to speak their minds.  The newer Indigo’s that have come into the world are currently in power but soon they will be on their way out.  They are extremely intelligent, bright, spirited, and wired to a slightly higher realm, and they are slowly raising to a higher level of consciousness.  They are naturally in tune, sensitive, highly spirited, multi gifted, intuitive and clairvoyant.  As they mature they seek to implement positive values, acting out to improve fairness and justice by introducing subtle changes from the old ways into the new.  The older they get the wiser they become striving to understand the feeling of total connection of mind, body and spirit.

Indigo children are the seed starters.  They are the predecessors of the newer generation to come and are the fortunate parents of the second New Age children of the golden Crystal vibration the Crystal Children.
As Indigo’s they have inspired and served as mentors.  They have been charting new concourses, paving new paths, building foundations, and providing newer ways to exemplify change.

Michael Jackson was an exceptionally evolved Indigo Child.  He became aware of his callings early in his life.  Especially in regard to music, voice, dance, writing, the performing arts, and the Fine Arts.  Children and animals practically every living thing were also all essential parts of his world.  He innately knew the profound effect they would have on this earth.  

This illustration is the first of Michael’s Untold Stories.  It visually expresses everything that was and is Michael Jackson.  Let’s begin with Michael’s signature black umbrella.  The end of the umbrella is his microphone he held most of his entire life.  It extends upward, reaching out towards the umbrella panels and exposing sections of Michael’s Untold Story.  One of the panels is missing, and Michael is looking right through it.  His placid expression and serious glare stares directly into his audience.  The panels represent the future, the new projects he was ready to engage in, all rendered in black & white.  He is shown as a composes/writer working on classical music and as a movie director/producer on the set sitting in his director’s chair.  

Dropping down from each of the four spokes of the umbrella are important highlights of his life that were most important to him.  At the top left Michael is portrayed as a performing artist. He is wearing  his signature black crystal jacket with a silver crystal armband, white v-neck t-shirt, and white rhinestone glove and he is singing and dancing to “Billy Jean,” introducing for the first time the Moon Walk that only he could have mastered.  Bottom left is Michael spending quality time giving out presents visiting a sick little girl in her crib either in a hospital or orphanage on his free time or while he was on tour.  Bottom lower right is Michael as a new father holding is firstborn son with pride, adoration, gentleness and love.  The final image shows one of Michael’s greatest humanitarian efforts among many, he is holding a small boy he saved by spending a year working tirelessly to get him a new liver—-Michael was determined not to give up!  The color lemon yellow surrounds Michael and all four hanging images; the color travels upward to the top of his umbrella and flourishes outwardly.  Like blood vessels it pushes energy through and expands openly into the atmosphere.  The color lemon yellow symbolizes optimism, inlightmeant, and happiness.  It invites energy and sparks creative, inspirational thoughts.  Surrounding the umbrella is a leafy bluish vine that entangles and intertwines itself around the entire umbrella, intermingling and uniting all Michael’s genuine attributes that flowed freely as he gave so much of himself to the world.  The various shades of blue within the indigo vibration blend and evolve into other new colors , creating awareness and growth.

Michael is stylishly dressed in his custom-fitted long black coat.  The embroiled blue symbol on his right upper arm is the symbol of the Planet Mercury, the ruler of his Sun sign Virgo.  On the right lower cuff is the symbol of Gemini the twins, the zodiac sign of his Ascendant or Rising Sign.  On the lower right pocket is Michael’s initial embroiled in gold threads.  Below the pocket is the profile of Michael gently blowing  the delicate seeds of futuristic change upon three faded Dandelions.  The Dandelions are symbolic if his three New Age children, whose seeds will fertilize and grow.  To the lower left of the coat is Michael as a young boy, only thirteen years of age, with his close friend Ben the Rat.  This is to capture Michael’s innocence and the many decades of hard, commitment, dedication, and service he shared with all of us.  His unconditional love and thirst to give of himself as a man, father, performing artist, writer and humanitarian are unparalleled.  At the very tip of the leafy vine by the microphone that Michael is holding are blue ribbon streamers like those coming from a present, conveying how fortunate we all are to have been given such a unique and precious gift.  Everything you visually see, and feel in this illustration comes full circle, from the beginning to the end, It is a never-ending wheel, symmetry in motion, and a perfect example of the true essence of Michael Joseph Jackson…









Saturday, July 10, 2021

One World




Michael’s  One World

8th Illustration in The Michael Jackson Series

By Donna Massa  2011

The Concept of “One World” was Michael’s vision.  If humanly possible he would have traveled to the ends of the earth to fulfill this quest.  During his life he hoped for our future’s sake that the children of all nations would link together and share this common goal. That being said, when the time came, if necessary, he would have exhausted all measures in any attempt to make his dream come true.  


In this illustration my goal was to visually express Michael’s vision.  The large futuristic ark is his adaptation of a modern architectural design.  The ark is only used to suggest a way out if necessary due to the severe global climate changes we will be facing in the future.  Similar to the story of Noah, there is a gathering of all living things.  The particular animals I’v chosen to show were some of the animals that Michael cherished during his lifetime, even to the butterflies, and hummingbirds.


The children represent at least seven continents and many other nations.  Some children are dressed in their native costumes, each assembling to enter this beautiful heaven of freedom and intrinsic serenity.  Michael is casually dressed in a light-blue cardigan sweater, which represents peace and tranquility.  He is present at this joyous celebration as he shares delight in each child’s expression of joy, unity, adoration and compatibility among all God’s creatures.  Blanket now Bigi Jackson his youngest son, clings to his father’s leg for security.  He is wearing a red T-shirt and holding a red balloon.  The color red symbolizes strong emotions of passion, love, and beauty and beside blue is one of Michael’s favorite colors.  I chose the Beech tree, the “goddess of trees” which sums up the wisdom and unification of all trees.  It symbolizes understanding, sustenance, and preservation of knowledge for all generations to come.  The grassy terrain is made up of varying slopes in many shades of green.  Green is the color of healing, and the peaks and valleys represent the many stages and degrees of healing.  Michael’s oldest children are in the forefront, for they are the gatherers.  They instinctively know their purpose, and the other children flock to them for attention, acceptance, love, and understanding.  One World is a heavenly place the way Planet Earth first began, it was pure, innocent and naive that is why Michael chose children to be brought together so they may change, heal, and unite in becoming Michael’s One World…




Friday, July 2, 2021




 

The 7th Illustration in the Michael Jackson Series

Title: “Whatever Happens”

Illustration by Donna Massa  2011

This Illustration was created purely from my imagination and my heart.  The song “Whatever Happens” is entirely moving and emotional for me, and from the moment I heard it, I knew it had to be illustrated.  The Spanish rhythm, Carlos Santana’s signature lead guitar and style, beautiful lyrics, and Michael’s voice were the scene that literally set the stage.  Michael is portrayed as the entertainer as he stands center stage,  He is dressed as a Spaniard with a black custom dress shirt and black fitted pants.  His long black hair is severely pulled back.  He wears a plain black leather dress belt with a secondary Spanish sterling silver belt ornate with embossed silver studs hanging to one side.  He reaches out with his right hand in a dance of intertwined unity, while his left arm pulls toward the back, his hand expressing dramatic need.  His stunning profile, sincere glare in his eyes, and intense expression speak for themselves as he sings from his heart.  The principle dancer, standing to Michael’s right, is his Spanish Senorita, who is portrayed by Miss Joan Sevigny.  She is in a traditional Spanish Flamenco dress.  She wears a black- and-white embroidered lace vest bodice with a black silk fringe.  Her dress is fuchsia pink in Regal satin, with the the same pattern of the black lace border around the entire hemline of the skirt.  Satin petite buttons streamline down the entire back of her dress.  She wears a purple satin asymmetrically draped, overlay, ruffled flounce that she dramatically swishes with her right hand as she moves and joins in the dance of their hands.  Their hair intertwines like a fragile rope with a cloud of maize yellow, that symbolizes the endless devotion and blissful joy they share with each other.  On the far left, the great Carlos Santana traditionally sits and plays his enchanting guitar, accompanying the dance between these two kindred souls.  

This piece is illustrated from the front and Michael’s back I felt would be a more compelling view for the audience.  I also chose to identify each character with his and her own individual spotlight and hue.  The individual hues highlight the unique identity of each character as the spotlight matches the true colors of their emotional presence on stage.  It is also important to point out that this is a story about two lovers who’s enduring love is compromised and complicated.  It is symbolic of the very dance that Michael so often spoke about in his songwriting of forbidden love and the difficulties of finding true everlasting unconditional love throughout his career. 

In this particular dance Michael repeatedly had only one request: 

“Don’t let go of my hand…”


Wednesday, June 30, 2021

 





The 6th Illustration in the Michael Jackson Series

Title:  ‘Twas The Night   
Illustration by Donna Massa  2010

Description:  In this illustration Michael is symbolically compared to the real St. Nicholas of Myra, who lived in the fourth century AD.  It is remarkable, their personalities and character traits I found to be amazingly one and the same.  In this adaptation of the story “ ‘Twas The Night” before Christmas, Michael is portrayed as a king rather than Santa Claus.  His clothing attire is similar to that of the Holy Fathers a Cardinal, Bishop, or Pope, he wears his jeweled crown that was exclusively designed for him.  I chose the colors red and burgundy for his outer robe, for these are the colors of royalty.  The intricate gold-threaded brocade borders his entire robe, and his gold satin cuffs are symbols of the jeweled inlaid motifs customary of a Pope’s robe.  His hand mitts are made of soft white leather with square-shaped jeweled motifs.  In his right hand, he holds the staff of St. Nicholas and in his left hand the candle of holy light.  He carries toys in a velvet sapphire sack and is scurrying about with no time to waste.  The room that shelters his three children is designed with furniture of the sixth-century England.  The floor boards are composed of rich, glazed, painted oak traditional of the times.  Above the canopy bed is the white peace dove, the symbol of the Holy Spirit.  It’s light and purity beam out over his children with eternal grace and unconditional love.  They are tucked in securely with a white embroiled cotton eyelet bed skirt, while their stockings are hung neatly on the stylized notches joined to the front of the foot board.  As a devoted father and king, Michael’s most important stop is his children first, for they are the very essence of his heart and soul…

 



     


    

The 5th Illustration in the Michael Jackson Series

 Title:  The Scarecrow

Illustration by Donna Massa   2010            


Description:  In this illustration Michael is portrayed as the actor.  He played the scarecrow in the 1978 movie “The Wiz”.  Notice, he is comfortably draped on a T-pole in a large field of mammoth sunflowers.  Normally the Scarecrow is placed there for protection against predators that can damage the crop.  In this case the scarecrow is among the beauty of these intricate multi-petaled yellow soldiers, an army of enchanted figures that salute to their leader the Sun.  He imagines himself as the sunflower dancing with them, seemingly part of their mystique and perhaps transforming completely into one with them.  The large black Raven is perched on his right shoulder finds comfort in his presence.  The only feature on the scarecrow that is uniquely identifiable is Michael’s eyes.  Their unique, large shape and round, black pupils reflect a twinkle of pure white light.  There is a pale yellow tint that surrounds the scarecrow’s brain.  As with some of the other sunflowers in the illustration, this is symbolic of the candle of light they all share in connection with each other.

It is ironic that this illustration was created in 2010. Fans found out much later in time through an exclusive interview with Michael’s first wife Lisa Marie Presley that the sunflower was Michael’s favorite flower and wanted them in his home freshly cut each and every day…



                           

 





The 4th Illustration in the Michael Jackson Series
Title: “The Clown”

Illustration by Donna Massa  2010

Description:  In this illustration Michael is in traditional French costume dressed and painted as a porcelain clown.  He appears stoic with a slight dip in his stance and raised shoulders.  His expressive porcelain hands are poised in harmonious symmetry.  His facial expression is distant and ambiguous.  A rainbow of colors embellishes the curtains surrounding him.  He stands on a box podium with the sun’s radiating canary-yellow light totally encircling him.  Canary yellow symbolizes all that a clown represents to a child:  a warm, bright, happy, funny and cheerful disposition.  The two children are offering the clown two balloons as sentimental relics.  They’re in awe of his presence, for this clown is different.  He is not sad, nor is not happy, and he doesn’t seem to move, so they both wonder, “Is he real?”











   3rd Illustration in the Michael Jackson Series      

Title:  Peter Pan   
Illustration by Donna Massa   2009

 Description:  This Illustration shows the compassionate side of Michael Jackson.  As the character of Peter Pan, it symbolizes how Michael relates to special children in need.  The character of Peter Pan is symbolic of being ageless and timeless.  The character also expresses Michael’s enduring love by showing how he reaches out not only to the sick and injured but to the unfortunate and underprivileged.

In this illustration Michael is portrayed as one of his favorite characters Peter Pan holding and consoling an abused, injured and confused young boy.  As in the story of Alice in Wonderland, the giant mushroom symbolizes the internal frustrations of puberty.  The March Hare symbolizes frolicking wildness and adventurous curiosity as he peeks out from the sturdy stem of the mushroom.  The painted Turtle’s shell, on which Michael places the heel of his loafer, symbolizes creation, strength, stability, innocence, protection, and good fortune.  Tinker Bell is near the right shoulder of Michael, and with her magical wand she weaves a protective shield of healing colors that radiates into a rainbow, opening the heavens to Michael’s magical world called Neverland… 





Planet Earth




                                                                                

                               Planet Earth My Home My Place

2nd Illustration in the Michael Jackson Series

Illustration by Donna Massa   2009


Description:  This Illustration is about Michael’s poem he narrates in his own voice on his “This Is It” album.  Michael skims over his life’s journey and deep appreciation for out planet.  In his poem, “Planet Earth,” Michael speaks of tender breezes he feels gently surrounding him, pushing back the flowing strands of long black hair from his face.  His body clings to the earth, caressing it with this whole being, as he gently lays his head upon a pillow soft and blue.  Inside the extension of his upper arm are the many history books he’s read over time.  Flowing down through his veins is the music in his blood.  Streaming out from his finger tips is his fiery passion, and heated internal desires.  His upper torso formed the sea of life, with growing turbulence and unmerciful fury.  The taste of the ocean’s salt, and the smell of the Bitter Sweet flower is reflective of Michael’s lifestyle.  The lemons symbolize the bitter and the oranges the sweet.  The potent fragrances that Michael smells are the fragrant white Easter Lilly, the red American Beauty rose, the Bitter Sweet berry flower, the fuchsia Hyacinth, and Lilly of The Valley.  The Bird of Paradise, and the different varieties of green vegetation represent freedom and healing.  This lush tropical environment creates sounds, beauty, and peaceful surroundings he often longs for.  The majestic mountains in the background that dwell within an early evening sky provide protection, strength, and eternal stability.  Michael reveals through his poem all four elements: earth, air, fire and water.  Their symbolic importance is consistent within his nature, and are ever-present throughout his life.  Throughout his poem Michael also expresses all five of his human senses: sight, sound, smell, taste, and touch.  He reflects on the individual importance of each sense as precious gifts, and the joys he receives from having them.  Michael’s poem also lets us peek into a small window of his soul.  He innately understands the earth as being our only home, and the need to respect, nurture, and protect it.  His keen instincts and deep connection to all living things, enable him to become one with nature.  Michael loved our Planet Earth, and understood his intrinsic connection to the entire never ending universe…

          

                                      

 

Tuesday, June 29, 2021

MJ Series








                                    

                    The Michael Jackson Series

Title: Michael’s “The Giving Tree”   
1st Illustration  by Donna Massa   2009

Description:  As many Michael Jackson fans know, Michael loved and appreciated trees.  He had a special California oak tree at his Neverland Ranch that he climbed regularly.  In this tree he built a special place where he could sit, look out, feel peace and become inspired.  He was quoted in an interview as saying he wrote many of his best songs in this tree.  He felt being in this tree was truly magical, so he called it his “Giving Tree…”  

If you look deep into the tree, three shapes clearly define the feelings and principles that were deep in Michael’s soul.  The branches of the tree form three graphic symbols.  The heart: Love surrounds him and is within him; from the tip of his finger it flows upwardly and outwardly.  Peace: All our nations live together as one, and we see the tranquil unity of our planet in Divine Grace.  The Butterfly: This figure stands for rebirth, transition, wisdom, independence, beauty, and the soul.  The trunk of the tree is Michael’s body.  The lower branches are reaching out, just as Michael reached out and gave to his fans with open arms in many of his performances.  At the base and inner core of the tree trunk is Michael’s pure light and energy eminently flowing up and out through its branches.

According to Michael’s astrological Nadir Chart, Michael’s Sun or birth sign was in Virgo with an Ascendant or Rising sign in Gemini.  This means his character was a combination of the elements earth and air.  The moss-green oak leaves, and the sway of these leaves, circulate and intertwine within gentle breezes of the wind.  His independence, personal identity, calm exterior, creativity, and gentle earthly manner are illustrated by the rhythm of the leaves and the ease with which they sway.

If you look very closely, you might fine within the pattern of the leaves and branches Michael’s hand and fingers.  Michael’s hands were one of his strongest features.  They were an extension of his unique ability to communicate with his audience.

Michael is portrayed in the fashion and colors he was comfortable wearing.  He sits in a casual position, gazing high over the land.  One rarely knows what he is thinking, but one thing you can be sure of: he is content, happy, and at peace…

        

                                  


Wednesday, June 23, 2021

The Nandi Man





  NANDI

There is simply no way to put into words the pain and horror of having your kitty disappear out of thin air!

On Sunday June 13th at dusk Pacific time I opened the door to take out the trash.  Nandi as if he had an adrenaline shot stormed out of the door that was opened no more than his body could fit in the blink of an eye.  I knew it would be dangerous as many of you know small pets are not secure outside especially at night in todays world.  There are countless dangers in the wild, especially if the animal is a house pet or in my case an indoor kitty.

Nandi was a Seal Point Siamese male kitty just short of ten months old. His name was derived from two very influential men from India.  Paramahansa Yogananda, known as the first bridge from the east to the west, was a Hindu Monk, Yogi and Guru who introduced millions to the teachings of meditation and the healing and enlightening Kriya Yoga.  The other was Mahatma Gandhi an Indian lawyer, anti-colonial nationalist, and political ethicist, best known for effectively using nonviolent resistance to lead the successful campaign for India’s independence from British rule and in turn inspired movements for civil rights and freedom across the world.  I would say that combination was quite the fit for our Nandi. 

Nandi was found in Tahachapi, California under a bush while not more than a few weeks old.  The women who found him fed him with an eye dropper to keep him alive.  She called him Rocky and said he was feisty and a real survivor.  I had been looking for a Siamese kitten for three months.  When I first saw Rocky he was so tiny and his points were this adorable dark seal triangular shaped face and ears the rest of him was-very light.  I believe what made him stand out from all the others was his tiny body and the cutest expression on his face I just fell in love with him.  I decided that was the kitty for us and I called the Tahachapi adoption agency.  He was still too young to adopt so we waited a few more weeks.  Nobody was really sure how old he was exactly they speculated four to five weeks old.  


We drove up to Tahachapi in mid October, 2020 to pick him up and take him home to become part of our family.  He was a joy, so tiny he could fit in the palm of our hand.  Of course we had to spoil him with lots of toys, a scratch board, all natural litter made from walnut shells and an all natural dry kitten food that was his favorite.  


As the days went by we felt Rocky was not appropriate for this little guy and that’s when we decided on Nandi.  It didn’t take long for him to know his new name and although our RV travel trailer was small, early on he was seemingly happy in it.


During each month we found such joy and company playing and training Nandi.  He took well to training and learning the word no.  However the word no became a game and if you know anything about Siamese cats they are smart as a whip, cleaver  overly curious, and love a lot of attention.  When it was time to bring Nandi to the vet for shots they determined he was born around the first week in September they estimated this by the growth of his baby teeth.  It was decided the 5th of each month would be a reminder of Nandi’s birthday.


As Nandi grew he discovered he had claws and, as he began to understanding their uses, soon he was tearing into practically everything - including us.  Often, as I walked from the kitchen to the bathroom he would would grab the opportunity to use my legs as he would a tree. “OUCH no Nandi, NO!” 


Clearly, he understood the reasons for his verbal reprimands, however, no matter how sternly said, he generally ignored all no’s directed his way.  Nandi definitely had a mind of his own which in time led to more than a little temper.  Whenever he didn’t get his own way he would become naughty Nandi.  After the new year Nandi was quickly growing he learned how far and high he could leap and jump. He knew the growing power of his back legs, which he’d use like a Jack rabbit to launch himself twirling into the air.  He loved to play with toys on a string, especially catching them by leaping remarkably high - if need be - to meet the challenge.  


New difficulties increased as he grew and his desire for far greater territory to run, roam and explore, and clearly he’d outgrown his surroundings.  If he lived in a home with two floors and a basement, he would have had room to run, roam and explore, or perhaps hide, escaping the increasing “no’s.”  The larger he became, the more obvious it was he needed MUCH more space, if he were to remain an indoor cat.  Nandi also had a very defined, defiant and destructive side, which clearly came out whenever he didn’t get his way.  Similar to a spoiled two year old child, at times he’d jump where he shouldn’t or begin clawing furniture, despite three scratch boards he seemed to love.  Keenly aware of when we were angered by something he’d done, he’d often start out to do even more damage, a case could be made he did so out of spite.  It was then that we determined Nandi was a menace to society!  He never was very affectionate or lovable, if you put your hand out to pat him gently, he would try and bite it.  When he first came home with us, he seemed to enjoy being held and loved.  While still growing, he became less and less affectionate and it was impossible to cuddle with him anymore.  Playful, yes he was always game for that, however, he was becoming less and less interested in even his most favorite toys and games. 


His personality was increasingly withdrawn, he became cold toward us - unless hungry - and he never physically expressed love for us.  God only knows how he ended up in a bush while very young, perhaps there’s a genetic connection and his family was always in the wild.  There were times when I wore a particular woolly top which he would suck on while kneading with his paws like he would do with his mother.  A strictly inherent act, as we know he never experienced this natural instinct and closeness with his mother so I let him enjoy the comfort.  


Nandi showed all the signs of having an unnatural experience as a new born with his mother.  The closeness, his mothers way of cleaning him, sucking for his food, smelling her scent and the entire nurturing process that happens with six to eight weeks of being with his mother and siblings.  I contribute his behavior, in part at least, to being separated from his mother while so young, never knowing or understanding how important it was for him to have a mother.  


Over the past few months Nandi seemed increasingly unhappy, he seemingly felt caged in and desperately wanted to explore the outdoors, which he watched daily through windows.  This was unsettling as I knew the dangers that lurked in the night.  He was supposed to be an indoor cat that is how we were training him.  We were making plans to move and live in a much larger dwelling full of space.  My husband was planning on building him a long pole with a perch so he could climb to the top and be king over the land! 


By the end of May on Memorial weekend my husband was scheduled to have surgery he’d been hoping one day would be possible for nearly 25 years - then put on hold due to Covid. When we had to go to Stanford for the long awaited operation, Nandi had to be put in a boarding home.  I paid for the luxury boarding package that included a room with a view and scheduled daily playtime.  We were gone eight days and when we arrived to pick Nandi up the girl said, “thank God your home Nandi was crying and wouldn’t eat I think he is homesick.”  I didn’t realize how much he hated being confined because before the surgery we had to go up to Stanford to meet with the surgeon, we were gone only five days.  Nandi’s first experience with boarding seemed to be fine when we picked him up he even acted like he missed us.  However, this second time around he came home different.


On May 13th we were preparing for another trip to Stanford for a post operative follow up, however, this time we were planing on taking Nandi with us.  On that fateful Sunday we were preparing to leave for the third time and Nandi was jumping in and out of the bags as if knew what was happening around him.  Siamese are so intelligent that I wouldn’t put it pass him that possibility of leaving him again was inevitable.  That evening at dusk, my husband was trying to keep Nandi pre-occupied however, when the door opened he scratched himself free and boulted out in 3 or 4 leaps to make his escape!  We tried every trick in the book to get him back inside as it was getting dark and I feared him being outside, especially at night.  For hours he frolicked under trailers next to, or quite near us, this was an entirely new, enlightening experience for him and he wasn’t interested in coming back in.  I knew it was dangerous and he was inexperienced exposing himself in the street with light lanterns decorating the park.  There are many trees, bushes, grassy areas and flower beds surrounding the park the gate on one side of the park is easy for a small animal to pass through and there are large birds of pray, skunks and coy-dogs lurking about.


It was getting very late and we put his food on the top step and kept the door opened.  It was now 1:30 am and my husband went back outside calling him, looking under trailers nearly the rest of the night, never seeing or hearing anything the park was silent.  The next morning, Monday the 14th I flew out of bed grabbed my robe and searched the park yelling and screaming his name, I would not let up as I was crazy with fear.  We had to leave no later than 9:00 am in order to drive four and a half hours to make the appointment.  We talked to our neighbors, filed a report with the police, warned the front office of his disappearance reporting Nandi missing we did everything possible before we left the park.  We were sick and heartbroken having to leave with no answers and no sight of Nandi anywhere.  While at Stanford I called the park asking if anyone reported seeing, finding or taking him in for safety, sadly there had not been any such report!  


We arrived home on Thursday afternoon, again there was still no trace of Nandi.  Five nights had gone by since Nandi’s disappearance and Southern California was hit the worst heat wave in history along with a severe drought.  Temperatures rose on Monday the day we left to 104, 107 and 110 degrees Fahrenheit for eight consecutive days with lows in the 90’s and no water except sprinkler systems in the park.  The chances for Nandi who had been sheltered every night since we first brought him home, enduring this daily dry heat, were not favorable.  We heard stories of wild animals seen suffering and possible fatalities among people without air-conditioning, especially the elderly and homeless.  The city of Bakersfield, CA is slowly becoming filled with oil wells refineries and is now known for having about the most polluted air in all of California. The heat made the extremely poor air quality even more dangerous and many people were ill from it, along with reports of heat stroke, dehydration and heart failure.  Between the blazing hot sun,  breezy hot air, crumpled dry grass, stepping out from air conditioning felt like opening a hot oven door.   


The final stages were the most difficult for me.  Collecting all of Nandi’s belongings and putting them away or giving them to the local SPCA animal shelter.  We cried for days we couldn’t imagine how he vanished without a trace!  All kinds of horrible thoughts went through my mind thinking the worst possible fate.  I became physically and emotionally ill over it and had to stay in bed.  Our Nandi was really gone…


All I can say is that although Nandi was only a nine month old kitty, the unexpected, shocking loss is very difficult to accept.  I cannot imagine a mother loosing a child without a trace, it is unbearable to think of.  Living with such uncertainty, countless unanswered questions, wondering, waiting, forever hoping, without the slightest closure or clarity, nobody should ever be left with such anguish and emotional pain.  We’re left with the fact that over time we will learn to accept the reality that we once had a beautiful, rescued Siamese kitty we loved dearly that vanished in the night.  “The Nandi Man” will be cherished in our memories forever….


Donna N Jeff